I had to have Sean the horse put down this week. Basically his sarcoids erupted so there was no skin cover and they were just this huge bloody ball under his legs, too big to scab over, bleeding constantly and a magnet for flies. I had already had someone call out equine welfare in the last few weeks when there was a small area bleeding. This was huge.
I knew they could never be cured. They could have operated, but this meant Sean going away and he has not been in a trailer since he was 4. He gets stressed with change. His cushings also meant he would have a reduced ability to fight infection.
It was a lovely sunny day, he came in from the field all clean and I groomed and gave him some feed. Luckily in the last few months I finally moved yard to a quiet farm yard in the same village.
Nobody was there in the farm yard and we found a secluded spot. It was quiet and peaceful and very quick and I just stayed with him until the lorry arrived.
I just feel very sad. It feels another big loss of a significant constant in my life, but it was also a privilege to have him for nearly 22 years and I kept him and paid out for him when it was seriously difficult for me to do so.
He was out with his mates till the last. I rode him last week. I was able to put my arms around him and say thank you. I was able to bury my head in his body and just smell his lovely horsey smell that has soothed me so much over the years.
I hope there is a place in heaven for horses.