I end counselling

Posted Tuesday March 08, 2016 by Hazel Durbridge

Me at my younger brother’s first wedding

I am writing this on one of those wonderful September Indian summer Fridays feeling wistful that I have to work at all. How are you? How is your treatment/ailments progressing? Are you still doing slightly less stressful/demanding projects? Secondly, how is your house progressing? I have a mental image of your proposed glass walled upper floor taking shape and various extraordinarily tasteful bathroom, kitchen and other fitments beginning to take their rightful places, with you, master of ceremonies, orchestrating it all from that bloody uncomfortable futon.

I had my ‘final’ counselling session on Wednesday. Final because I definitely can’t afford to indulge myself anymore and final because I know I’ve probably come to the end of what qualifying, analysing, valuing, sobbing I can do! Basically a bit of me will always love the quirky, delightful bits that made FH, FH, but I have proved that I can love different qualities in other people and can probably live equally contentedly, if differently, with a new man. I can certainly manage on less money and doing everything myself. Finally, I have her ‘blessing’ to go off and leave Luton and those wretched constant reminders – picture collages, uninvited visits, hurtful this, that and the other. I just have to find myself that job!

A* is off to UEA on the 18th September. She got her A-level music remarked and got a higher grade (administrative error!). This means that Durham would have taken her, but she decided she didn’t want to go there after all. Possibly a mistake in terms of snob/intellectual kudos, but it’s her life and must be her choice. J1 has finished at Animal Crackers and starts at Waitrose concurrently with school restarting. Will he be able to apply himself harder this year? I’m not so sure. J2 went camping with friends in France and sprained his ankle so badly he has had to spend a week with his foot up.

Still no divorce through. Some anxiety as Siobhan’s husband has changed his mind about giving her the equity on their house, but I’m reasonably confident it is just a question of bureaucracy for me. Not sure of the recent state of play with newly ‘temporarily’ separated Jenny and Dave. She did the very human thing of ringing up his girlfriend/inappropriately involving their children/ranting at him endlessly and he is now ‘reconsidering’ his previous remorseful position. I do think he has a less hardened attitude than FH though.

Email me that you are OK/not OK which requires less effort than phoning.

I watched that TV film on the Hamburg Cell last night which I found very thought provoking. With the recent hijacking of children in the Russian school I’m just not sure we can go on internationally with these policies we have. There must be some other way of finding middle ground for the disaffected.

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